Can someone please confirm that don pardo didn’t die I can’t handle that right now
i love the term “partners”
are we dating?
are we robbing a bank?
do we run a legal firm?
are we the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies and are members of an elite squad known as the special victims unit?
ive lost all motivation to do anything these days and people dont understand they just tell me to get motivated yeah sure let me go down to the store and grab a bottle of purpose in life
girls don’t like boys girls like buffy the vampire slayer
Christians call The Bible “the greatest story ever told” almost as if they’ve never heard John Mulaney’s Salt and Pepper Diner
You Aren’t Boring I Just Suck At Conversations I’m Sorry: a novel by me
I’m Not Ignoring You I Just Don’t Know What To Say: a sequel by me
I Feel Like I have Nothing Interesting To Say So I Don’t Say Anything At All And I’m Really Sorry Don’t Stop Talking To Me: the trilogy.
*breaks down your door*
*smashes your computer*
*punches you in the face*
*begins community marathon*
OH MY FUCKING GODDDDDDDDDDDDD